Susan Hansen, Extension Educator Colfax County

 

Why is it that some children say good bye to their parents with no fanfare, while other exits are filled with tears? Such differences in temperament are common and important between siblings, say researchers at Michigan State University in East Lansing.

 

A child’s temperament affects how the child adjusts to change. This contributes to how anxious the child feels when separated from parents. Parents are wise to consider this when making transitions, such as entering a new day care or school. Some children adjust to such a change in a few days, while others take a month or more.

 

For a slow-to-warm-up child, the amount of anxiety can be decreased by familiarity with the new setting. It’s a good idea to walk around the facility with your child when few kids are present. Comment on the positive things you see. By visiting settings, your child becomes familiar with the settings.

 

It’s a good idea to avoid comparing your child to classmates, siblings or other children and how they cope with separation issues. It will only increase the anxiety level for everyone involved. Comparing makes the adjustment period longer and more painful.

 

Making adjustments can be easy if you take into consideration the differences in temperament in the child. Helping children accept transitions can ease stress and anxiety for both child and parent.